Nationalism and Religion - Opium to fool the masses

There is no dearth of bigoted people in politics, but they flourish because they are smart enough to give credence to the thoughts of a sizeable populace who are themselves bigoted and ignorant. These politicians are using the weapon of nationalism to distract citizens from talking about fundamental issues (poverty, pollution, drought, economy) and brand those who don't tow the line as anti-nationals. Forcing people to say, "Bharat Mata Ki Jai" is one such instance. 

BJP General Secretary Kailash Vijayvargiya and Baba Ramdev (brother of Baba Kamdev) are two such specimens of Reptilia Bigota.

Can these two please clarify the following

1. How frequently should we say "Bharat Mata ki Jai"? Can we just say once (say in the bathroom)

2. Who will record that we have said "Bharat Mata ki Jai"? Does it have to be in front of BJP/Sangh/RSS Office. Is a selfie video ok.

3. If there is a foreign born person who is now resident in India, does he have to say it?

4. What if someone says "Bharat Mata ki Jai", in a sarcastic tone (say when India loses in a game, when they see huge mounds of garbage, when they are bribing a government babu in a hospital to allow carry out life-saving operation on their loved ones). How will you know the difference and who will judge that the statement was heartful or sarcastic?

5. What about the Indians who don't want to say anything positive about India but have no other passports. How do you plan to deport them?

Mr Vijayvargiya you are general secretary of the ruling party and Babaji, you are the 'owner' of the fastest growing FMCG brand in India, so would expect your statements to be logical and actionable. Don't see that being the case. EVER. Any party for that matter.

First ever full - Farnham Pilgrim Full Marathon

Phew, ran my first full marathon ever at Farnham Pilgrim. It just wasnt your usual run-of the mill 42.2 km. With an elevation of 1781 ft and a route comprising tarmac, gravel, steps, sand, mud, busy road crossings, wooden stiles, and gates, it was a mini obstacle course.

  

But there was no masochism in choosing this as my first marathon. I have run about 8-9 half marathons, most on road. 21.1 km distance had become less of a challenge, and I thought its best to check a full marathon off my list before I turn 40. Over the years, I have also realised that road running is a lot less fun that trail running - road  is monotonous and harder on your knees, trail is varied, and more stimulating. The route changes every few feet - grass, mud, gravel, hill - making you alert and forcing you to run a bit slower. At the same time, you use of more of your leg muscles to stabilise your feet, so helps strengthen them rather than breaking them down.

At the same time, mass participation events have become a big turn-off for me. Farnham Pilgrim is still a small event with a total of 700 runners for full and half marathon. The entry fees are not a rip-off and places are guaranteed even at the last minute. You are not herded like sheep at the start of the race and its easier to mingle with family and friends at any time. In spite of it being a small event, the organisation was top class. It has consistently rated in top 10 marathons since its inception.

Knowing how tough it was going to be, I was less focussed on the time, and more on finishing it. Didn’t want to face the embarrassment of not completing it due to injury or hitting the wall.

I trained the best I ever trained for, for any event. Apart from a few missed runs (due to illness and travel), I was mostly on track. Joining my local running club – The Striders – also helped tremendously. Training with others during speed sessions was the key in training at the right intensity which you just don’t achieve when you train alone. At the same time, learnt a few warm-up/cool-down routines which I then incorporated in my sessions.

The plan I followed was of another trail marathon. Didn’t want any more than 4 sessions per week as I know I would struggle to make the time and it would be harder on the body. If you are a regular runner and are only aiming at completing a marathon in good shape and not in any ambitious time, 4 sessions is more than enough.

I even ran most of the Farnham Pilgrim route a month before the race to familiarise myself with the course. Glad I did, because it gave me a sense of the challenge that lay ahead. This race was not to be taken lightly.

Photos from recce run

Photos from recce run

The race day itself was perfect – lightly overcast, but no rain, and temperature in mid teens. 

I had decided to start slow around 6:30 min/km mark. However, just like most runners, got carried away in the moment, and the aim of running negative splits was soon going to go out of the window. For a first timer, it is hard to judge whether running slower will actually help you run negative splits and if you will still have the strength at the end to run faster.

Anyway, was hovering around the 6:00 min/km mark for most of the first 10 kms. This stretch has minimal climbs, so it was easy to keep the pace without feeling fatigued. Though there were some steps to be climbed on the way, the first (and biggest) real test was around 20 km mark at Church of St Martha-on-the-Hill . 

The climb here is continuous 1.5 km or so with a LOT of sand. It was so hard to find a grip that almost everyone was walking up rather than running.

From here, it was steep downhill run for a while. However, there was no scope for taking it easy. There were 5 hills one after the other. Fatigue and pain had set in at this time. Having done distances longer than 30 km in training, I knew that the pain was pure fatigue related and wouldn’t stop me from finishing the marathon. However, now the run was taking a mental toll. Every water station was an excuse to stop, every hill was an excuse to walk, especially when other runners were doing the same.

At around 2 miles to finish, decided to run at a steady fast pace. In my mind, it felt like I was running at 5:30 min/km, however, in my watch, it was hovering around 6 min/km. The legs were heavy as logs and no amount of exertion was making me go faster.

Caught up with a female runner who was running steady. Instead of overtaking, got into first real conversation with her. But she decided to pause before the last hill, so I kept going. Wife and daughter saw me coming and I ran with my daughter to the finish line

I finished the marathon in 4 hours 39 minutes, which was slightly more than what I had anticipated, but can’t complain. The legs are stiff, and my gait will take a few days to get back, but haven’t got any serious injuries. Overall, am glad that I registered for the run and then completed it in good time. One of the highlights of the year, and probably, my life.

Focus on Protection and Prevention, Not Punishment

Whenever we hear of a major in India crime that causes national outrage– a heinous rape or a terrorist attack, the only cries I hear, even from the sanest and most ‘educated’ of Indians are to mete out harshest of punishment to the perpetrators. The punishment methods usually suggested are chemical castration, flogging, shooting dead, or hanging. They also want it to be meted out by swiftest possible means. Right Now! Nothing else would do. The criminals don’t have a right to defend their case. They don’t deserve to be heard. They are evil and inhuman and don’t deserve justice reserved for normal folk. They have already been judged.

There are massive moral and legal issues in meting out justice in the swiftest and sternest manner. Think of one innocent amongst the thousands of actual criminals, who didn’t get access to a decent lawyer, and who was not allowed to build his case due to the exigency to ‘carry out justice’. And the case was heard and then he was hanged. We all clapped and applauded, and 2 days later, we found out that he was actually innocent. Oh, well, we murdered an innocent man. Its ok, some collateral damage is fine!

By focusing on punishment, people also miss the real issue, which is of protection and prevention. By the time is crime is committed, the ship has already sailed, and capsized. Lives have been ruined – of the victims, their families, the criminals, their families. Whether they deserve it or not, is not the point. Damage has been done irreversibly.

By focusing on punishment, we have already let the real perpetrators off scott-free. The real perpetrators who are the root cause are the State and its various components who have played a significant hand in the creation and development of the deviant individuals. In the case of social crimes, the factors that contributed to the crime are societal, cultural, and law enforcement failures. In case of terrorist attacks, these could be intelligence gathering, surveillance, and interception failures.

You might argue that government doesn’t control society’s attitudes and cultural leanings. But I think it does. A liberal government allows all voices to be heard, all faiths to be practiced, all differences to be allowed. It allows dissent and disagreement, as long as there is no crime committed (i.e damage to property, physically hurting people you disagree with; causing offense and mental anguish are not crimes). If you give confidence to the people that radical or ultra conservative beliefs are not given covert state support over other beliefs, you get a more open and free society, not where you are watching what you say, and looking over your shoulder for being non-conformist. Such a society is fundamental to serve the needs of the minority – women, children, people practising non-majority religions, atheists, gays and disabled.

The government also controls society’s attitudes and cultural leanings through education. It can invest more in education of the weaker section of the societies – women, poor, lower castes – ensuring that they have better chance to move up socially, integrate more fully with the rest of the society, and be well-represented in all important spheres of life. It can also keep education ‘agnostic’ of all religious, philosophical, and economic dogma, and let the kids make up their own minds.

Through genuine freedom and openness, and education, government can not only shape social and cultural views, it also encourages citizens to be more responsible. Promoting genuine freedoms, education, and mobility are significant 'soft' steps in protecting the people and preventing any major crimes.

The 'hard' steps in protection and prevention are with respect to law enforcement, intelligence gathering, surveillance, and interception. Again, we have seen that there are persistent systemic failures in all of these areas. Crime is frequently under-reported, police stations are notoriously understaffed, police rely on informal khabaris for intelligence gathering, and survelliance is very poor. We know of oil tankers blown off course landing within a kilometre of the Worli Sea-Link without the army/navy/police knowing about it. No major overhaul has happened after 26/11 that will give us confidence that the issues have been addressed.

All these failures on the part of the state need significant step-by-step attention and remediation. They can’t be fixed in a day and there are no easy solutions. The solutions may take time to implement and realise. Sometimes, the solutions may span different departments and jurisdictional areas. Perhaps that's why, there isn’t a willingness to address these. The state just moves from one crisis to another, focussed purely on damage control, and blame-game. Blame the criminal, we have no part to play.

However, the people, by not going after the real problems and instead just focussing only the criminal, allow the state to wash their hands off their sins. 

And that’s the real crime.

Pirate Birthday Party - Preparation

Last week, I celebrated my daughter’s 7^th Birthday Party. She loves Swashbuckle, a BBC kids games show based on the premise of retrieving jewels from bad pirates. I like the show as well, so decided to give the theme a go. Arraagh!!

Invitation card

a.       Template

I thought the invitation card should look old, worn-out, possibly like a scroll. Here is a template I created.  I used pirate-y language with specially downloaded fonts (‘Rapscallion’, ‘Freebooter’, ‘JLS Smiles’- all are free). Pre-loaded windows fonts should also work alright. I made the template in visio as it was create and move text boxes and images around easily. I converted this into pdf and jpeg.

Visio to edit the above template (download this as it wont open within browser)

I wanted the venue location to be shown on a treasure map, so I used http://www.yarrmaps.com/. This is how the final product looked like.

b.      Aging

After printing the main invitation and map on normal paper, I used some aging techniques to make the paper look old. I primarily used wikihow - http://www.wikihow.com/Age-Paper-Using-Tea, but then experimented with the time, and ingredients. First I crumbled the paper in a ball and then uncrumbled it, I mixed unused as well as used tea and soya sauce in water, soaked for about 1-2 hours in the solution, and then hung the papers overnight for drying on a make-shift clothesline on top of the kitchen sink. Sometimes, I dried quicker by putting the papers on a heater. The effect was pretty good.

c.       Presenting

We rolled up the paper like a scroll and tied with a thick plastic thread. I folded the map along the folds printed using yarrmaps, and inserted into the map folded along the fold lines created using yarrmaps. I ensured that the roll was tight enough for the map not to slip through.

Pirate Ship

I created the pirate ship in two parts – front and back. This was driven by the size of the card board available, and also allowing kids to go in and out without damaging the ship or hurting themselves. The two parts were kept independent of each other in order to not affect each other’s stability. It also gave the ship a bigger scale compared to the size of the actual pieces.

The material used was cardboard. I have found cardboard to be great material for house hold crafts and creative work. It holds its shape, easy to cut, easy to flex. Any mistakes in cutting can be corrected when you glue paper on top of it. E.g. if you cut a hole too big, you can correct it when you put a covering paper over it. Then you can cut the hole the right size.

Ensure that you keep the cardboard folds on the smaller sides. This is incredibly useful for stability ensuring the rest of the cardboard holds its shape.

e.g. you may not need the bottom part of the cardboard (in the picture above), but instead of cutting it out, just keep it, as it will stabilise the vertical face of the cardboard, also you can stick the bottom part on the floor to ensure that the structure stands up on its own.

a.       Front part of the ship

The front part of the ship was made of two pieces – The main base(bow) and the ornamental part on top. I used a 40 inch LED TV box. I cut bottom part in a curve without cutting off the joint between the two largest cardboard pieces. I just shaved off the bottom part such that it doesn’t destabilise the box and it stood. I sliced the bottom horizontal face from the middle (without cutting the face off entirely) for reasons given above.  I cut of the top horizontal face entirely. This allowed me to open the front up.

Just around 1/3 the length from the front, I gave two incisions from the inside. I kept the front looking like a triangle, and along the incisions, straightened the top vertical fronts (highlighted part) such that they were almost parallel to each other. This made the front look like a typical ship

I cut off three gunports on either side

Now for the ornamental part – I cut two parts from another smaller cardboard box -  I joined the two pieces around the pointed  edge. The stuck the pieces straight up on the inside of the large pieces.

I stuck brown paper all over including the insides. This allowed to cover all the sticky tapes. I cut the gunport holes again through it, and used to brown paper to adjust any mistakes in cutting.

Note – If you cut the top horizontal edge slanting down from the front, it will look even more like a ship. I did not cut the as didn’t have a cardboard piece that was high enough; it would have made the ship look much smaller (almost a boat).

b.      Back of the ship (Stern)

For the back, I took another box. This was slightly taller than the first box, but it didn’t matter, as frequently, the back of ships are taller than front.  I used an entire card board, slicing it along on edge, and flattening the rest such that I had two equal sized faces joined along an edge. I cut this edge at the bottom in a curve. This stern curve was less sharper than the bow’s.

For the top part, I cut a cardboard of the shape shown. Again, I used two faces of a box, which were already joined together on the spine, and cut out the rest. When inserted in the bigger piece, it imparted strength and shape (in a manner of ‘>’ sign) to the whole back part.

Repeat the cycle with brown paper, gunports. The entire piece looked like this.

c.       Finishing

I put papers on the edges and (corners, gunports). I also covers the full ornamental pieces and front thin face with the same paper. I put horizontal stripes in brown paper (Doc link) along the length of the ship for additional ironwork detail. I inserted a bamboo stick through the bow and made it stand and hung a A4 printed pirate flag (‘Jolly Roger’) from it. (See the link)

Face in a Hole

Here is the link to the image. Open in mspaint. Hopefully, the settings are intact that will make the picture split on multiple pages. Take printouts and join the pages together like a puzzle, stick it on a cardboard. Cut out the hole. 

Treasure Chest

a.       Base

Take a cardboard box, and cut one of the top flaps. The other flap will go under the lid

a.       Lid

Then, take another cardboard/s, and cut them in two semicircles. Now get a cardboard that is length of the curved part of semi-circle (circumference) and as wide as the front face. Give it incisions every 4 cms or so from the inside to allow it to bend and hug the semi-circle snugly. Now wrap it on the curved edge, and stick it with strong tapes. Cover it with inside face of the semi-circle with brown paper.

Before you stick the chest lid give the flap as well incisions on the inside, so it touches the underside of the lid closely. Use glue and strong tape to bring the two together.

c. Decoration

Brown paper for iron work, highlight the nails, stick on a latch and lock. Here is the final product

Jolly Roger (Pirate Flag)

Here is the visio for the Jolly Roger flag. Visio viewer is freely downloadable

Money Notes

I wanted some money to be put in the treasure chest (we also ran a game around team stealing most from the chest wins. I copied note images using created British currency notes in word and put them in tables, to ensure that the images don’t resize in case they are big. Also you need back to back printouts. Attached is the document that you can use for printout.

Note that the margins need to be adjusted so that the back and front face line up exactly. They are slightly skewed, and I ended up cutting the corners slightly in to remove white in each side.

Here is the link to the doc.

Costumes, Games, Props etc.

We ended up making the jacket ourselves. Rest we bought, stripy, black and white, lose frilly stuff and co-ordinated the pieces with each other to make a complete costume.

Eye patches -

Pirate Balloons 

Pirate Bunting

Decorations, plates, glasses, table covers and other clothing accessories – Amazon, ebay, poundland, 99p shop

Games planned and props for the day are here

Names Badges

On Birthday day, kids were asked to pick a pirate names from the list, write it on the badge, and pin it on their costume/dress. The template for the badge is in the doc.

Ship Names/Team Names

Kids were put together in teams, and asked to pick a ship name to represent their team.

Sea Shanties/Pirate Songs

I downloaded stuff from youtube (using http://www.clipconverter.cc/), and torrents. These, I played in the background during games, eating.

Song that my daughter liked the best (she doesn't understand the naughty lyrics yet)

Diwali Play for Kids

We performed a play at Park Hill School Croydon, UK, to explain the stories behind the five days of Diwali and the various traditions and rituals undertaken on each of the five days across various parts of India. The audience was kids from the age of 5 to 7 years. Possibly, can be used as it for still older kids (and even some adults) with minor changes :-)

The full script is here http://goo.gl/BPJQD2
Here is the presentation used (download and view in powerpoint for correct view) - http://goo.gl/TlDLFo

You are free to use with proper attribution. More importantly, do share your videos and photos of performances.

Here is a link to the Ramayana Play for Kids as well

Intolerance and Ignorance in India

Recently, a committee, headed by retired high court judge Chandrashekhar Dharmadhikari published a report to outline measures to to curbattacks on women and reduce crime rate in Maharashtra. Instead of presenting findings in an objective and evidence backed manner, and putting the accountability on the responsible parties (police, government, judiciary) to provide active policing, improved crime prevention, better criminal investigations, and swifter prosecution process, it finds easy, but wrong scapegoats, and recommends curtailment of human rights and free speech. 

these relics of the past who sit in our government and such committee force their own prejudices and opinions, without actually bothering to study the evidence on the effectiveness of the measures they propose. 

They especially detest and are opposed to things that they don't understand. Facebook/Whatsapp can be very easily made scapegoats as they are popular channels which the old fogies don't understand or have used. Both are used for productive or even entertainment purposes far far more than they are used to harass people. They may be used to share pornography, but so is a lot of the internet. Does the government need to frame a policy on the internet. What point is framing is a policy, if the government has rats chance

in hell of actually implementing the policy.

The bias demonstrated here is the interpretation that pornography and morality has anything to do with sexual crimes. There is no causation or even correlation. In fact, if at all, there is inverse correlation

between the two. http://goo.gl/CfzJ8Y If at all, these ancient creatures should recommend we encourage pornography (just kidding!).

Another confirmation bias is the interpretation that dance bars led to drop in cases of crimes against women. Even if we assume there was a drop in crimes against women, just considering the insignificant number of

dance bars within the state and their concentration is parts of cities only, it is highly improbable that there was any causative association between the two.

The only way to substantively confirm the committee view is check the crime statistics in areas near to dance bars and check where the bar dancers are now (probably plying their trade underground where it is very difficult for them to report any crimes due to the nature of their trade).

Another bias - "the committee held social networking websites responsible for rising divorce cases" – where is the evidence Sir. Your report should cite studies/surveys undertaken either in India or elsewhere to justify your claims. Probably, when TV came about, the dogmatic folks probably said they were leading to infidelity and divorce.

“Vulgar activities carried out through Facebook, mobile and computer, social networking sites need to be tackled urgently, because it has been observed on a global scale that divorces are on the rise in marriages taking place through Facebook" - This statement is utterly meaningless and incoherent. Marriage taking place based on meeting/connections established to facebook have NO relation to vulgar activities. Just because you put a BECAUSE between the two doesn't make them related. If marriages happening by virtue of people meeting through facebook are failing, are you going to stop people marrying if they meet on facebook? Are you in charge of Hindu arm of Taliban?

Scotland 3 day trip Itinerary

Following is our 3 full day itinerary -
Some notes
1. Itinerary was planned keeping in mind family needs - 2 adults and a kid of 3 years.
2. Wanted to do a bit of walking as well, which we did in an unplanned way at Luss.
3. Though it was May, it was still fairly cold in some places

Day 1 (landed at Glasgow from Gatwick, hired a car from the airport)

1. Loch Lomond Luss, Argyll and Bute G83
2. Oban PA34
3. Kinlochleaven PH50 - nice drive
4. Glen Coe A82 - must visit.
5. Fort William PH33  - can be avoided

This was the view from Luss

Day 2

1. Ben Nevis - must visit.
2. Fort augustus
3. Loch Ness
4. Inverness - Stayed here. Did the Dolphin cruise. No dolphins. The season is Aug onwards.

Day 3

1. Cairncorm-fenicular railway not done
2. St Andrews not done
3. Pitloclry - beautiful views. must visit.
4. Killicrankie - nice Scottish town
5. Sterling - lovely castle. great views, easy stopover. Did not enter the castle. Don't really think there is a need

Dropped the car off at the airport, flight at 7 pm.

CBIP - questions

Just took my CBIP exam in data management. It was my last exam and guess what, got a 69%. Again, it was tough. The questions are generally tricky with the NOT IN category. e.g. Which of the following is not a relevant for data integrity.

There was another question, which was one of the following do we don't consider while defining a primary key
1. whether the key is dependent on non-key elements
2. key values are unique
3. the same primary key is not defined in another entity
4. some other criterion

Here, the question is not what conditions are SATISFIED when defining a primary key, but what conditions are CONSIDERED. Meaning we can consider the conditions and arrive on the conclusion that the primary is not a primary key. So, that makes it a valid condition (hence 1, which will tell you that the key is not a primary key). We need to find out a condition which is invalid for primary key definition (hence 3).

Some other questions.
1. Importance of information is measured by which 2 parameters
...
2. An temp(there was another word used, I forget) employee and contractor employee are entities in a org, but an employee can be a temp or a contractor, not both. While modeling subtype, supertype relationship, what is not true.
a. Some data belongs to temp entity only and some data belongs to contractor employee entity only
b. employee is a supertype
c. temp entity and contractor entity are exclusive subtypes
d. ...

3. domain type is the same as
a. ...
b...
c...
d. class word

4. Who is a data intemediary

5. What is the full form of PDCA

6. what is data definition commonly referred to as
a...
b...
c. metadata
d...

7. What is the first training activity for a new joinee to a DM team
a. data stewardship
b. enterprise model
c. system appreciation
d. data model

8. what is the difference between data administrator and database administrator

9. What is the most time consuming activity during data modeling
a. defining attributes, entities, relationships
b. determining stakeholders and business smes
c. defining scope
d. ...

9. In which notation is relationship represented as diamond
a. chen notation
b. idefx1
c. NIAM

10. What is data accuracy

11. Data accuracy is measured in
a. %correct
b. %complete
c... d...

11. What is not a domain type
a. city
b. code
c. name
d. quantity

12. What is the format for attribute naming convention
a. business term + domain + class word (not sure if this the right answer)

13. What should not be done for naming entities
a. use underscore
b. use complete business term
d. use plurals

14. What is not the benefit of Joint Application design/development
a. Project planning
b. for programmers during system development
c. for system compatibility while preparing for a dbms upgrade

15. What is on the columns of Zachmann Framework

16. Parent child relationship is representation of which database
a. relational
b. heirarchical
c. network
d...

17. How is RDBMS more flexible than network and heirarchical database

18. Marketing of data management should be done to
a. business team
b. it team
c. all the organization
d...

19. Authorization is required for
a. for allowing people to access systems
b. determining the level and type of access to be given
c.

20. How are the reponsibilities of user captured in Policy document
a. verb
b. adjective
c. noun
d...

21 conceptual model helps to
a. show things in real world scenarios
b...
c. capture model in abstract ideas

22. difference between enterprise model and logical model

23. What should not be the approach while presenting a data model to the management
a. show all attributes, entities, relationships
b. hide the complexity to present a simple understable view of the organization

24. Derived data is redundant because
a. it is calculated
b. it is transformed from one or more primitive attributes
c. it has the same name as primitive attribute
d. it is represented multiple times

25. an entity referring to one or more instances of itself is called
a. recursive
b... c... d...

26. which of the following is a likely entity
a. vendor
b. employee_id
c. customername
d. order_no

27. Employee name, dept id and name is present in a table. it is a violation of
a. 1 normal
b. 2 norm
c. 3 norm
d. boyce codd norm

28. meta data is defined as
a. data dictionary
b. data about data

29. state transition diagrams

Ramayana play in 15 minutes for kids

This is a Ramayana script I and a few others wrote to explain the mythology behind Diwali to school kids in UK. The play runs for 15 minutes and is supported by audio visuals projected on a screen. The play ends with a dance performance with Ram, Sita and people of Ayodhya dancing with lights celebrating Ram's return on Diwali.

The videos are here (first 5 minutes lost)

Great North Run - running for Kids in need of Education

This is my 6th 1/2 marathon and 2nd Great North Run. The training this time has been lot better than that on previous runs, so really looking forward to the big race day, 16th September.
I am running for "Kids In Need of Education" which is a charity that supports education for kids in the Indian subcontinent. I have worked with Akansha, their partner in Mumbai and seen first hand the fantastic work they do for underprivileged kids.
With your support, we can not only put some deserving kids through school, but I can also take on the 5k and 10k Olympics champion, Mo Farah, who is running the race (and quaking in his boots right now).

Here is the link to donate.

http://www.justgiving.com/abhitoraskar/eurl.axd/905a8cfcb82df94f831971d181ab3250


Please dig deep and donate now. Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Once you donate, they’ll send your money directly to the charity and make sure Gift Aid is reclaimed on every eligible donation by a UK taxpayer. So it’s the most efficient way to donate - I raise more, whilst saving time and cutting costs for the charity.
Posts on my previous runs are here.

Toastmaster's Icebreaker speech -The Tyrovial Pursuit

This was my icebreaker speech - more or less - forgot some parts. Guess what - the definition of a tyro - right at the start.

**********************************************************************
I am XX I am a tyro and my life is a Tyrovial Pursuit.


A tyro is one who dabbles, rookie, a novice. Jack of all trades. Master of none.

I grew up in Mumbai/Bombay. I was quite good at cricket, football. But the focus back then was always academics. It was really competitive back then, in india, not now it is. Soon, cricket, football fell by the way side. There were days at end I would come from school, and study straight through the rest of the day and night. Our neighbours didn’t know there was a kid living in our house. When I got tired of studying, I practised juggling, again good pretty good at it. But, never had the courage to perform in front of an audience.

As a kid I excelled at academics. It was probably the hard work, and learning by rote. When I went to my engineering, at technical subjects, I was found wanting. But I discovered my talents as a writer. But nothing came out of it apart from contribution to the college magazine.

Later on, I came to the UK. Here, I found people who pursue their passion passionately and are good at so many things. Whether it be hobbies like football, gardening, cycling, running, DIY. I was genuinely humbling and truly inspiring. I went back to football – 5 a side this time. I started running ½ marathons. But one thing I am truly passionate about is cycling, though not in lycra clad fierce looking athelete kind of way.

I took up running. I have run ½ marathons – some for charity and some for selfish reasons. The great thing about running is that you need minimal gear. You don’t need great weather, you don’t need mates, you don’t need to book courts. You decide when you want to go, where you want to go runnig.

I don’t own a car. I still haven’t graduated to long distance cycling on a racing bike. I have a commuter bike, mountain bike and also a boris bikes for London commutes. I love to use them for routine needs. Travel to work, nursery runs to pick up or drop my daughter. Picking up groceries. And yes, for leisurely rides. In fact, many of you will remember, I said I will go cycling at Isle of wight on Jubillee weekend. I did with my daughter, wife and cousin. In the most awful weather, we did about 12-13 miles of cycling. But we completed it, and in hind-sight, like everything else, it was fun.

But have I learnt to fix the gears and brakes. Or dismantle and reassemble a complete bike. As much as I would like it, no. I have been busy learning tricks on my new scooter. Not an electric scooter. Yes, push scooter. The ones that frustrated teenagers who can’t master skateboards or rollerskates zip around on. I had bought it an oversized one for my daughter. She saw through it. Now, doesn’t want to use it. She wants another one thats pink. Not silver.

Another passion of mine is badminton. I picked this sport about 6 years ago. But have become a regular player, sometimes playing thrice a week. Made some fantastic friends.

Swimming, Tennis are other activities I took up late in life. And I think I am rubbish at them. But all of these have helped me uncover a part of me. I may not be great at these things, but I enjoy them.

Trivial Pursuit is a popular game, I haven’t played Trivial Pursuit as yet. May be one day I will try that as well. But right now, I am happy to continue to pursue a no of things to keep trying, to be a noice. I am happy to keep on playing the Tyrovial Pursuit.

Rejected speech from Toastmasters Ice breaker

This was supposed to a humorous speech, but ultimately thought it was too dark and pessimist.

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I am XX and I am plagued by self-doubt. What a topic to choose for your ice-breaker speech.


For the last 9-10 months, I have had a no of serious challenges thrown at me, some I managed to navigate through, others have left me dazed. They have raised a number of fundamental questions about who I am, how others perceive me, and if anything, what do I need to do to remediate it.

Let’s start from the beginning. I was born in Bombay. Bombay/Mumbai is a great place to grow up. Back then, India was still a closed economy, so growth in all parts of India had not really kicked-off. If you had to make it in life, as an Indian, your default destination would be BOmbay. There are about 22 millions people in the city. With so many people around, it is difficult to get through. In fact, you have to fight for everything – space on the road, seat on the train, admission in a good college, just about everything. In fact, when I was talking about seat on the train, I was kidding. You don’t get a seat on the train. The way to get into a train is stand on the edge of the platform till your nose just about misses the train. If you have positioned yourself such that the train stops with a door in front, then you just stand there. The mass of humanity will sweep you and pack you up into the nearest tiny crevice. You forget about your limbs till you get down. You just can’t see them. You stand with your rib cage crushed, your foot trampled by your other foot, sweating and trying to stay sane as few others who have lost their sanity from the daily inhuman torture shout and argue with others. It is the easiest place to get frustrated.

In school, I was fairly good, but there are hundreds around who were far superior. But I didn’t quite do well during my time studying engineering as an undergrad. But it was the first time, I started seriously doubting myself. It went away during my grad years and then at earlier jobs where I excelled quite well. I picked up new skills, worked in new business areas, and travelled to UK.

Here, I found that self-deprecation, not giving oneself credit is an intrinsic behaviour. In fact, to say anything nice about yourself is frowned upon. Add to that, the general pessimistic, cynical but still humorous disposition of the people. Remember, I told you some time ago. I was planning to cycle at Isle of Wight with my family. Yes, we did. in pouring rain. We were greeted with “What lovely weather!”

Also, with less no of people compared to India, places like UK also offer you space to develop and grow. There are less questions asked of you. I was/am inspired folks who excel at and give their all to hobbies like gardening, cycling, running, DIY, juggling. I started to passionately follow some of these. I became good at things other than acads and work.

I got into consulting. I had been primarily a IT focussed beast all this while, there were challenges at work, but nothing of the nature you face in consulting. Because consulting is not about what you are or what you know. Consulting is about what others think you are or what others think you know. This is no way a criticism of consulting, that’s the nature of the game. It’s almost like a hyper-realistic simulation of life itself where all stimuli, responses, emotions, and rewards are magnified manifold. There is only so much you can influence what opinions others form of you. You are solving complex problems for large organisations where you have not worked before; you are interacting with so many people for brief amounts of time. In spite of no of hurdles - your lack of knowledge, and time, you have to convince people to trust you and go with you. People who are delusionally confident about their abilities succeed generally.

It’s also very cutthroat. People forget to be nice to others. Its almost being back in the crowded Mumbai train, but now it happens in the garb of civility. Terribly disconcerting that is.

I am middle-aged now (middle aged for an Indian- we die sooner unfortunately) I am married with a daughter. I don’t look it though. While buying alchohol, I got asked my id card twice in the last 5 years. Now, you will say that’s a good thing. Definitely not! Especially at work, where people immediately assume that they have been short-changed with someone fresh from college. So, I am just dying to get some wrinkles and grey hair. I already sound like a grumpy old man. I better look it.

I have learnt you can’t win all the battles in life. In fact, trying to please them all is a perfect strategy for failure. Consulting is an awesome place to learn. Because it makes you ask fundamental questions about your identity. The key is for the doubts not to overwhelm you. The key is not to give up. After all, success is the ability to go from one failure to another without losing enthusiasm. Till there’s nothing left. No failure, no success, only your indisputable self.