Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Negatively perceptive

There's lots that you can observe when you work when different teams at odd times, in different locations. And the fun part is, as people become old, they become weirder. Hence more to notice and note.




1. A guy at my office, uses the keyboard with both hands at right angles to each other. Imagine the right hand, quite where it is supposed to be. But the Index finger of the left hand is on Z, middle finger on A and the ring finger is on Q. So the right hand is forced to dance everywhere on the keyboard, while the other hand is left guarding two most unused alphabets of the English language from further abuse.




2. At Accenture, one of the guys at work had curly hair. Not just normal curls. If you had just seen his hair walking about, you would have thought he was black. Well, one hell of a parched dry, frizzy and untamed hair. At about 2-3 pm, he would take out a huge comb, and start the combing operation.


Kkhaaaasshssssshhhshhhhh.....KkhsshssssSSSSSSsssssshhhshhhhh...

Kkhaaaasshssshshsssshhhshhhhh.....KkhsSSSSSSshhhhh.


It was a brand new sandpaper trying to a smoothen a rocky face. "Be very frayed" say my nerves.




3. Another quite nice guy unfortunately had a major jaw problem due to the randomly arranged teeth (now whom does that remind me of). Anyway, while speaking, he was a Satish Shah in Main Thoo Na. Esp, during telecons, it was just hilarious to watch the phone digits getting sprayed with spittle. He would sheepishly wipe out the wet-spots (which is now leading to tides eroding our shores, just to put things in perspective) to expel more bodily fluid (Eeks!)




4. A manager that suddenly goes Khhhhhhhhhwwaaa. KhwwWWWaaaAAA... during meetings. I sympathise. He is actually clearing his throat off a dinousaur bone that accidently got wedged in his wind-pipe during one of his earlier births as a cave man. He was digging a hole for himself (a cave) and a whole fossil colony of dinosaurs dropped on him. As the ricketing mass of bones fell, he 'gaped' in horror.




5. A guy called GLN, used "Actually, OK" (together) as punctuation marks and more. He began, ended and interspersed his sentences with liberal doses of "Actually OK".



"Actually OK this project needs to Actually OK have 2 resources. But, Actually OK, we will have to use Actually OK only one. Actually Ok you are that only one actually OK. So actually OK best of luck actually ok to you." (note that there are no punctuation marks before and after actually ok which is a sic).





Can't I take pride on being perceptive? I am sure somewhere, one of my collegues is making a list, chronicaling my idiosyncracies exclusively.





More captain quirks to follow. KhhwwwWWWaaaaaa..
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